All About You FRIDAY – The Perfect Kind of Round

I am lucky enough to work in a profession where I get to meet all kinds of people. All day long, I have conversations and encounters, some that leave a lasting impression.

“I had a visit with my doctor the other day, and he told me I’m losing weight way too fast,” my 87-year old patient said. “But I realized I did it to myself!” he proclaimed.

He is a retired philosophy professor with wiry gray hair on his head and face. He usually comes in wearing baggy sweat pants and layered shirts, as if he is ready to go on a hike. We have had many conversations about life. He is a deep thinker and though our beliefs don’t always align, I have learned a lot from him. I appreciate his curiosity and sense of wonder about things and the inflection his voice makes when he happens upon a discovery.

“Why do you say that?” I asked.

“When I hurt my shoulder, I became very depressed,” he explained. “I stopped eating and I lost 10 pounds. But I kind of liked it because I was a little heavy. So I just stopped eating as much. And I lost more weight. I think I got a little addicted to losing weight.”

He went on to say his doctor told him he needed to get more protein and instructed him to peruse a certain aisle at a local grocery store. “I’ve never seen anything like it!” he said excitedly. “All sorts of protein bars and shakes and cereals.” He and his wife stocked up.

He said he took a long look at himself in the mirror and realized how thin he was. “I as thinking about who had the kind of body I wanted and I thought of you!”

“Me?!” I asked. I felt myself standing a few inches taller.

“Yes,” he said, “You are the perfect kind of round.”

(sound of record player stopping abruptly)

Now, I can think of about a million other things to say to a menopausal woman in her late 50’s. I did have a six pack once. For like day. I think it was after I did a triathlon over a decade ago. Sometimes I look in the mirror and wonder where it went.

“I mean that as the highest compliment,” he went on to explain as he saw the puzzled look on my face. “You’re just the right kind of round,” he emphasized as he waved his arms in the shape of circle. “You’re strong,” he added for clarity.

I could have been offended, but the sincerity in his voice made me take pause. I’ve never considered myself a circle, but maybe…

I went home and my partner had made a delicious salmon and pesto pasta dinner. “I might only take half of that pasta,” I said. “Apparently, I am the perfect kind of round.”

We laughed as I relayed the story. “You aren’t round,” she said in an encouraging tone, “You’re stroft.” (a term we use in our house to mean strong and soft). Love is a many splendored thing.

In an attempt to bolster my ego, I pondered the positive takeaways in this story:

At least one 87-year old man on this earth thinks I have the perfect body
I have laughed a lot telling the story, which can burn up to 40 calories in 15 minutes
Other people have laughed with me, which means I helped the world lose a few more pounds this week
I have analyzed the meaning of round. Round shoulders means I have great deltoids. Round people are way nicer to hug. It’s easier to roll over in bed when you are a bit more round. And you are more aerodynamic should you decide to run. (But you shouldn’t run too much because then you might lose your roundness and that would be counter-productive.)

I think there is something to be said for not being so easily offended and not taking things too personally. Giving someone the benefit of the doubt can open your eyes to an appreciation of another view point. They are telling you how they see it. Take it for what it is. You just might learn something.

Seek first to understand. Then be understood.

As for me, I think I want to get some t-shirts made. I have decided, I like being the perfect kind of round.

It’s been a long week. Don’t forget to celebrate. Whatever shape you are.

Until next time…